stupid me yet again

u came home today because mommy said we would be gonig to look at apartments tomorrow..i go through all the trouble to get it set up and everything for tomorrow and now i find out im not even going..if i was sure my car would be ok doing the drive i would go by myself..no idea how i would pay for anything but i would go..and i cant even do that..and for once when i actually called and talked to the lady and set it all up i have to call back and say i wont be showing up..how am i supposed to be getting an apartment when i call and say ill be showing up and then call back the next day and say im not showing up...its not fair! i didnt want to come back and after the long freaking speech i got for her about how she could only go on wed and how i needed to be home and all this junk..and so regardless of what i wanted to do i said ok i would come home tuesday instead of saturday..when i wanted to come back..i could have finished packing and then come..but no to save the arguments and a milliong conversations about how selfish i am..i said i would come home and now that i am im stuck here..waste of gas to go back..so stupid..i should have known better once again..stupid stupid stupid