shocked just isnt the word

im back from the awards ceremony...yvonne went with me..i got the achievement aaward for my class.. i didnt think i would get it..i didnt even know what awards they were giving out in the first place and i wasnt expecting to get anything at all..and once dr bunch started talking about how faith would be recongized tomorrow at the big graduation i really started wondering who would get the achievement one..the whole time she was giving the speech about why the person gets it i juts kept thinking please dont calll out my name..please dont make me go up there and get it..im guessing by the time i got around to thinking that i knew i was getting it..and still it shocked me all the same..and i didnt want to get up and go get it either but i did..i have a plaque and everything..my teachers knew and didnt tell me!! its nice though..almost want to be proud of myself..i cant believe they gave it to me?! me the quietest person in my class..i tried so hard to not be noticed and they noticed me all the same..and they didnt give up on me..maybe i am a little proud of myself..everyone congratulated me...its like now i know my teachres know how hard i worked to keep myself in school and to graduate and stay in the program...took a bunch of pictures..and i was really glad yvonne went with me..called mommy when i got out and told her..she called aunt frances and uncle jason and dee and i told them...yvonne decorated my hat thingy for tomorrow and saturday..i finally took out my gown and tried it on..its so long..and to big but oh well..it hangs to the floor! but suddenly im completely ready to graduate..wanted to cry a few times but didnt..i dont think mommy will be staying in town tomorrow..and the apartment is a mess and theres just no way to clean it up before they get here tomorrow..no way am i going to bother cleaning it up..just not worth it..between packing and having to pull stuff out to put it all away just to repack it doesnt make sense..so if i get yelled at ill just have to deal with it..hmm dont know what im going to do with my plaque just yet..maybe ill just look at it for a couple weeks and then hang it up after i move..and to think i didnt even want to go to the awards thing!