slow night

i really should stop leaving this thing open for hours on end and not writing anything..getting tired now..and actually made it through my horrible mood without cutting..came home and just got distracted mostly..watching cartoons and other random tv things that made me laugh..made dinner actulaly..well made breakfast for dinner..ran to the drug store and got some hair junk..did my hair and cut it again..but did it all the same..and now im watching tv and chatting and surfing the net..just to make sure i stay as distracted as i can..mommy is intent on making sure im out by jan..sucks in a way because im still so afraid of packing and moving..and shes just pushing it on me relentlessly..talked to hollice tonight and that did make me feel better..she thinks im getting a tattoo over the summer ..would be completely laughable if i was sure she would forget between now and then and im not sure she will lol..so ill have to figure that out whenever it gets here... and now im sleepy..it finally came to me that i onnly got 6 hours of sleep last night..way less than my usual amt and its so catching up with me now...found out mommy had surgery yesterday..how did she forget to tell me she was having surgery? and then swore she told me cas she said everyone knew..well i guess im not everyone since i didnt know..but anyway..it was fine and shes back to normal and said she would be here on friday..so ill be by myself at the awards thing tomorrow night..maybe i shouldnt go? i dont know..and maybe im just tired and out of it right now..