Thursday, November 16, 2006

not good

things just dont ever stay on an even level or whatever..i got a call today from a docs office in wilmington..saying it was an emergency and i of course freak out wondering what ive done or didnt do and i call the guy back and its not even about me..its about nia..im on her safety plan..shes suicidal and put me on her safety plan..i can barely keep myself alive and in working order and now this..she was in the hospital twice already..and since im two hours away its hard finding out how shes really doing by just the occasional talk on the phone or online..now im worried..i wont even be going home until next week..i called her and left her a message and im wiating for her to call me back..its hard, knowing shes having a hard time but im glad shes aleast getting help when she needs it..we are all so screwed up..it sucks..all of it sucks

yvonne has gone home again..another weekend by myself..barely seen her all week and now shes gone again..

its turned into a sucky day

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