good news

i got the job..im going back to talisman!! i found out officially today..well last night but i had to call linda today and talk to her..but yep im going back..i have to find an apartment..i have to figure out what im going to be doing when im not working..i have to figure out what im going to do about therapy...after thinking it for a few weeks ive decided if at all possible i will just come back to gville for therapy..it should be ok if it sticks to every other week but ill wait and ask to be sure..but once jan 2 comes ill be gainfully employed like a real person...im not sure i want to be a real person though..i want to go back i do..i want to be happy about having the job and i am..i was..i keep going back and forth between being completely excited and a little sad..i still dont want to graduate..somehow i keep wanting to just skip the graduation part..i want to skip the real world part and just go get lost at camp not doing camp things..but i dont want to get there and be ok and have to leave one day and go back to not being ok..it sucked this time and it will suck then too if it happens...i dont want it to happen..i really do what to be ok and able to take care of myself and actually like myself i guess..hmm no big thing is not wanting to kill myself..i really do see something wrong with that at least