not feeling very brave....

im really just feeling very tired...and sad.... i put on a brave face to every one ..but right this minute im just feeling like a reject...im looking at my stuff and knowing that it will be once again bagged up and packed away..and ill be in a hotel again..for a possibly undetermined amount of time and that just makes me sad...im scared and worried and anxious and i dont want to be in the hotel..i really dont...but again i guess no one needs to know that..so ill manage...i always manage...but again my need to be impulsive is picking up today...i want to cut..and im afraid i will...oh well.  i stink at being an adult..i really do..