bored

classes are over and i could study for my last exam or correct my paper due tomorrow but i havent ..instead i watched tv and destroyed the kitchen in the name of creating something and it was good if not a huge mess..played and lost hours worth of sims time stupid game..my fault for not saving more often but now i have to do it all over again and that is nerve wrecking..so today i wake up and put off doing laundry again and instead i cleaned up downstairs and i have every intention of finishing my room and the bathroom once im done chatting and well writing..somehow ive managed to be incredibly sad but yesterday i didnt know where it was coming from and today im not really sure i care..still its worrying me that ill have to go home sooner than i planned since i dont have any money..and even me with my incredible 101 ways to waste money without doing anything logic just isnt working and even i cant make ten dollars last for 3 or so weeks..and even if not eating for 3 weeks does sound really appealing the more i think about it..i suck at fasting anyway..and as of right now im kinda trying not to die or anything..all the same if the option is going home to just not really eating for a while..ill take not eating...logic pretty much just idnt going to work with that one and im sure if i think about it long enough ill realize it wont work but i still have another week before i have to really decide anything..

im actually starting to look forward to camp..more so if mommy would juts leave me alone about how much i wont like it...i wont even know till i get there and then if i dont like i just wont like and ill know not to go work at a camp again but if i do like it good for me i guess...not really that big a deal and its not like im going to decide tomorrow that i dont want to go to camp anymore..id rather go..a full summer away from everything..could be more fun than im giving it credit for minus the no full time computer access...computer withdrawl times 50 will suck for a while but then ill get used to it like i do everything else..
and this is depressing...ill have to find something else to write about