Tuesday, April 11, 2006

cant sleep

listening to music and thinking and thats about all..now i just cant sleep or i dont want to sleep and i know i have to be up in a few hours too..

yvonnes play was really good..i likeed it a lot and it was funny but had a few sad parts too..but overall really good..i love theatre a lot more when im not in it..i really wish it wasnt already past midnight or i would take something to go to sleep.since i cant im just stuck awake for now..ill prolly just bore myself into sleeping for a little while..this would be one of those nights where i want to talk but im afraid of what ill say and so i dont sign into the messengers to even check for anyone..id rather just drive myself crazy alone..ever since i wrote earlier ive wanted to cut..by the time i got through what i was thinking about i realized i wanted to cut..didnt when i started but the more i guess i got control over my head it came out..rereading what i wrote even i get a bit lost sometimes and i wrote it..im supposed to know what in the heck is going on and i dont..i have no idea where my train of thought goes sometimes ..domt really know i come up with somethings..

dusti got locked on the back porch tonight..i couldnt find her and yvonne helped me look for her and i didnt even know yvonne had been on the back porch..but some how dusti ended up locked out for a little while...scared the heck out of me when i couldnt find her

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