Tuesday, June 30, 2009

ok day

today has been ok i guess...

but im learning a bit more about how im dealing with the meds..and except for the tiredness the only other thing hanging around is the issues with eating..i take them in the morning and so i am trying to work through the tiredness during the day...i just prefer to take them in the morning vs at night..easier to remember and stuff ..but if i take it without eating then it kills my appetite for the day...if i take it with food then im alright..its so weird..maybe the heat today just made it seem worse..but in general i think im handling them well..

saw linda today..and that went ok too...she knows about the moving and thinks its a good idea..which i already could have guessed but it was nice hearing it from her..and she said that it shows a lot of growth you know..and we talked about ending vs transitioning..and mentioned that she would call some of the friends in va and ask about referrals..which i told her would help a lot..im thinking that it may take a while to get settled in and everything before i want to tackle the task of finding a new t..and knowing that linda would be willling to keep working with me (albeit not as often) made me feel better..because i think i may be back and forth a bit for at least a couple months..when i first move..mostly because of the kids i babysit and coming back on the weekends to see them...and then of course the possibility of not having a job and being able to come back on the weekends..fri - sunday..and being able to see t every couple weeks maybe..i dont know yet what to do about that..and also she mentioned that im moving right as we are starting to get anywhere with therapy..and i have to admit i had been thinking about that since yesterday ..and she does have a point..but i promise i didnt base the decision on whether or not it would help me get out of therapy..i guess it makes me feel a little guilty..just because of how it happened ..but gosh i think ive been with her long enough to know that if i dont want to talk about something..moving is not the way to get out of it :P and for that reason i know i will keep working on stuff..because im slightly afraid that if i stop now and then change therapists..the stress alone will stop me from talking about anything at all..and it took me so long to start talking to her as it is you know..stopping now really wouldnt be the best option

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