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im surprised ive been online almost all morning..watching epis of degrassi and pretty much wasting time..i dont want to do anything and if i could have slept for longer i would have just stayed in bed all morning and still done nothing..i dont want to talk to anyone or be around anyone..not that it would be much difference in my day considering i rarely talk to anyway except mommy or wayne..and i dont want to talk to them either..actually all i pretty much want to do is cut..and i was thinking about the absurbness of the entire situation..my legs are where i cut now..more so my ankles and various other areas but im sticking to my legs for now..i was cutting my shoulder last week and its easier to get caught that way..but i dont like sleeping with socks on and so i was laying in bed almost asleep and realized that mommy is crazy enough to have incredibly light sheets on my bed..i refuse to let her do my laundry but still..very uncool having sheets that light when im back to having various open cuts all over the place again..i could keep something on them but i dont want too..my head has gone empty it seems..guess thats just to bad..on a different note...yvonne said i could come and stay with her and i am giving it some thought..im not doing anything worth mentioning next week and i would only stay until friday if i left here on sunday because of babysitting on the weekends..but i dont think i can handle another week at home doing nothing..ive cut three time in the past week..more than ive done in a long time and its just getting worse...not that im saying going to yvonnes is going to make it stop..but just maybe getting away will help calm me down a little bit..dont know and havent decided..and its easy getting lost on campus..