surprised!

i dont know if i want to be proud of myself or slap myself for talking today...and i mean more than my usual talking with my doc...i told her about being a kid or at least what i knew from being a kid and some of what i was doing with like outside of school stuff and a little bit about my mom but not much...surprisingly time goes much faster when you actually talk...more surprsingly the owrld hasnt come to an end because i talked to her..im not like missing any major body parts and i dont know...im just weirded out with talking ..a little bit for right now...im calmer than i was thing morning but still feel like cutting for different reasons...trying not too...i have to work on mindfullness again for homework for my doc...and i dont have any new info on if shes leaving or not...and i talked her into letting me paint at my next appt :) im bringing my paint because ive collected a bunch of differnt colors lately..and i like my colors and my paint! oh well im at work trying to make up a couple hours so im going back to work some now...ill write more soon