long day i think

dusti woke me up early this morning...or it might have been something to do with the fact that i was freezing with the window open and had to wake up to close it...but dusti was back and forth on my bed this morning wanting to be petted so i did that and was half asleep and finally got up...went to the international fest today and it was fun but it would have been better if it wasnt so cold or windy...but there was a lot going on and i ran into catrina but didnt really have time to talk...im sure ill get an email from her soon though...i was worried i would run into my teacher but i didnt and that was good...i got my name written in japensese but i lost it before i left and i have no idea where it went but i really wanted it...spent most of the day at that and came home and helped yvonne with mario for a bit and we walked to the store and made tacos for dinner..fake meat of course! and it was pretty good .. at least edible! and we did that for dinner and watched a movie and i was trying not to fall asleep but then i checked my phone and had a bunch of messages from taly and there most likely a bout going out tonight and i am dying to get wasted for a little while but i dont know if im going yet...and she hasnt called me back so i really dont know ...still fighting the urge to go throw up dinner eventhough throwing up now would be pointless...but i still feel full and it makes throwing up seem like a good thing to do but i cant because yvonne is home ... i will have to tell aaran about the purging and i dont want to but i know i have to..maybe not have to but should...i dont want the purging to get out of hand but nights like last night when i wasnt even planning on purging and it just came out of no where and really did hurt big time...i was afraid i would start throwing up blood again but i didnt..i think maybe ill lay down for a little while soon...but yea have to remember to tell aaran..have to remember not to purge again...but im not cutting..sucky me its only been about a week anyway