hmm

im feeling restless..and i dont know why..im off but not really doing anything..ive been really tired since i got home yesterday..i slept most of yesterday away and im still tired..i keep trying to fall asleep but i never quite make it..im starting to get a bit nervous about my birthday.not that anything will happen but its making me nervous..for all ive talked about it i dont want anyone to remember..ill be at work so ill be busy but i dont know..i told mommy i just wanted money but i dont know if ill even get it..i dont really know what i want..well there are things i want but i know i cant afford..mostly relating to movies and books and cd's..maybe some other things most likely it will juts be another day..i hope i dont freak out or anything but i can tell im starting to get more quieter than usual..she wants me to go to henrys family weekend and i keep saying ok but i dont want to go..i have no interest in being told all weekend that ive gained to much and need to do everything possible to lose..she can tell me that over the phone and she has..its not like im forgetting or anyhting id just rather not have to hear it again..