trust....

i have been thinking about trust today..no real reason why..it was jut on my mind as i left one of my clients houses today...and i do believe that i trust the adults that i work with..in a different sort of way than i trust my family..but i dont believe my clients would hurt me...mental illness or not i truly dont believe they would..and yes i deal with some signficant mental illnses..and people with massive major issues..and still i go and talk to them and work with them..and treat them as i treat anyone else..and so yes i believe im safe with them...a couple of my clients live in not so safe areas..and like i wouldnt be caught in those areas at night..i wouldnt...but when i am there during the day..im nervous..and edgy..but then i see my clients..and they walk me to my car..they tell there friends to introduce themselves...somehow i am looked after even by them...and i think that is important..i mean i am not there to judge them or hurt them or anything..and i think that shows..and in return ..they protect me and allow me to work with them...

but at the same time i wonder if i am to trusting...if i am not keeping myself closed off to them...if i am crossing smoe boundary..and inside i dont feel that i am..how can they trust me if i dont show that i am able to trust them?  how can i accept them to tell me about there lives if im not slightly open and mention things in my life occasionally...im in there homes..in there lives..and i expect them to just willingly want to talk to me about EVERYTHING all at once..and i guess thats not completely fair you know...

hmm i dont know...just thinking...