this morning kinda did not get off to a good start ..i was stupid and forgot to take the bandaids off before going downstairs this morning..she demanded to see, as if i was lying about them being bug bites and proceeded to tell me i needed to stop doing that to myself..and so i just walked away and didnt really say anything..im not dumb enough to actually cut my ankles again..to hot for that because of wearing shorter pants and things..but yeah just went and did something else for a while..until got distracted on something else...

going to be taking the rental back on monday and getting all that taken care of i hope without having to be overdrawn but i think by the end of it i will be and then ill just be using mommys car until thursday when ill have the money to get another rental car and hopefully i wont have to keep it as long...its crazy ive spent over $2000 on the rental ..and then mommy doesnt get it when i say i dont have money... but im trying to be nice and not flip out around her because she is letting me use her car for a few days..and i know ill just have to make sure to help with gas money and thats a little more manageable..

but now im not at home..i came to the kids i babysit house to look after the dog and just hang out for a bit..and will be going home later on..no point in going home to do nothing..i can do nothing here and its a lot quieter..im trying hard not to complain at home because now with the younger brother home, and the older brother in and out a bit more..i keep getting stuck with cleaning up everything upstairs where all r bedrooms are..and its like well if we are all so called adults then there is no reason they cant clean the bathroom..but still it falls on me..to clean everything upstairs..and they get to go and do whatever..but its always like that so makes to sense to expect it to be different now..but still its upsets me a lot and its a waste to even bring it up anymore because then the conversation turns into how selfish i am..and how i dont help out enough..and trying to avoid that :(