a lot of randomness

ugh im nervous...really really nervous about the fla trip in jan..i really am..the closer it gets the more indecisive i become...yes im going..somehow i will get there and try not to freak out in the process..but goodness its nerve wrecking.. im afraid ..darn...but im trying to figure out how im going to do the hotel and everything..im trying to decide if i want to drive or fly..and because im so uncomfortable flying..i may just drive it..and i can make it a two day drive just so that im not super stressed out ...it will be more expensive though..driving it...but there are not any more nonstop flights out there..and it really is a straight shot on 95..but im going to have to figure it out soon because im gonna have to do my hotel reservation by the end of the month..blah..its like ok no more extra spending for anything at all until after jan ..good grief...but its either im going to have to get a hotel and a plane ticket..or a hotel and a rental car and loads of gas money ..essh.. im disappointed a bit that i dont have anyone i can ask to go with me :(  that is really hard to deal with...i dont do many things by myself and ill sorta know ppl once im at the conference but at the same time im kinda by myself too...but i guess at the end of the night ill be able to go back to my room and have peace and quiet..so maybe it is good...that i dont have to be so in control...so on top of things...who knows...i still have time to think all of this through..essh