the holiday and going home has really thrown me off..and we are just
struggling..and i know that struggling right now is to be expected
because of going home..and that means that mommy is going over board
with the 'you need to change blah blah blah stuff' ..she actually told
me today that i needed to starve and asked if i was going to starve
because i ate so much at home and that i must have over done it :(..i
didnt think i had over done it..but maybe i did..but it just leads to
all sorts of out of control eating and thinking and everything..i dont
know..i know its stupid to be so dependent on someone else and so easily
controlled by someone else..but mommy just gets to me..and its so easy
for her..and just 3 days home has been feeling completely off and messed
up and i dont know...just not doing so great right now...the stormy weather is stinky and making me feel super nervous..im hoping the power does not go out...
when i came home earlier i dont know really what happened..it was one of those i think i napped days but im not sure..just zoned out and laid down...i really dont know..
head is just not okay today..
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