Sunday, October 31, 2010

moving on...yep

i need to figure out things for work next week..i realize that well one i need to not miss anymore work..and two i need to figure out to do about my jobs and all of that...i admit that having some time off did do wonders for making me feel calmer and more focused...but also knowing that well its time to go back to work is a big pain in the butt lol...gosh being an adult is a hassle...but well the insurance person is coming to look at my car tomorrow morning..and i realized a little late that well that means i wont be going to my staff meeting tomorrow morning..and i may not be going to my staff meeting tomorrow afternoon...i may go and see clients in the afternoon and evening though...and not worry about my staff meetings...i have some paperwork to turn in that i can finish up and email for the most part..or turn in tomorrow afternoon...im not sure yet how tomorrow is going to work out..and then i was thinking about just going and getting the rental but that wont work either cas well i would prefer im not sure about the deductible yet and when it needs to be paid..so i have to ask that tomorrow morning..and see..and i actually did want to go to my meetings tomorrow ...so a lot of thinking is going to be involved i think...and planning...i need to reschedule all of my clients for this week..and make sure i actually am seeing them..cas im supposed ti be turning in my hours for the past couple weeks tomorrow..which is also why i need to show up at work..and well my hours are miserable...and i need to get on the ball..with work and stuff....and i also got an email from one of my supervisors at my second job and was told that one of my clients has asked for a different counselor...and well i figured that was going to happen and i dont mind at all that she did..but i feel bad that it came to this..i mean i know i havent been giving her enough time and that she is suddenly needing me all the time and i just cant manage it...but i still feel guilty and like ive messed up...and the past couple weeks have just been really bad and all sorts of things have happened you know..and it stinks big time...but when i talk to my supervisor about it i will just let her know you know that things just havent worked out lately...and move on...gosh..its hard..being and adult..making changes...struggling so much and still having so many families depending on me to show up and help them..goodness...

but i was looking at jobs online yesterday and there is a job fair on thursday evening i think...that i kinda want to go to and check out..i mean just to see what it is about..and well it seems like the company is really looking for people and i guess i want to keep my options open..but i do want to go and at least check it out if possible.

but did call my insurance yesterday..and thankfully it was ok..it went a lot better than i thought it was going to go..and well that made me feel better a lot ... and someone is going to come and look at my car tomorrow..and then ill just have to figure out when i can take it in ...and well things are moving along i guess....

today im also going to have to turn in my key to my old apartment..and well that is making me feel really sad and well just sad ... its so weird how things change you know..and i know they are changing for the better..but i guess the apartment was my last link to like having our own place...and i know its like short term and stuff..but yeah..will try again in a few months..ok i guess its time for me to get up and get moving with my day....thats the plan ..hmmm im pretty sure i have a plan for the day ... wow..head cleared so i think i needed to write...


dreams have been really weird lately...very very weird and im not sure if they are scary or not but just...umm yeah...a bit off lol...

ok really am going now...

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