really..woke up at like 7:30...ended up sleep again by 11:30...up again at five...and just took meds again for going back to sleep..
im not thinking..or doing anything at all except watching the hours go by until i can go back to sleep..i dont want to have to think anymore..my head hurts..and when im awake all i think about is how messed up everything is..and how hard everything ..and how much everything
how much everything is just messed and depressing and not ok...im tired you know..im really tired 
everything is a mess and i cant fix any of it 
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