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starting to feel really scared and anxious about my birthday tomorrow. mostly did stuff today with yvonne becasue she came yesterday night to visit. hung out and did some things today and we are going to the beach early tomorrow morning for a little bit..but i did ok most of the day without being to foggy/drifty..but now starting to zone out and feel too many things..really worried and sad..worried about making it through tomorrow..sad that im not happier about it..its my birthday..i should feel happy right? i dont know..im happy yvonne came but had a hard morning and didnt want to really do anything..but ended up having fun..stayed present..but now as things are dying down my head is drifting again...im feeling a little stressed about it all..trying to remind myself to stay calm..that its ok..and im ok..dont know if its helping or not..but i guess ill head to bed..its been a long day and if i stay up ill just stress more about it all..