update of sorts

well its been a busy few days..some ups and downs as usual but today is made me feel more optimistic than i have been in a while..training was today and i was really worried about it and stressing as i usually do and wasnt feeling to good yesterday or this morning from everything! but then i left this morning and actually ended up enjoying training as much as one can enjoy listenign to a bunch of rules and policies..everyone was really nice and i really do like the ppl in charge there..the paperwork part of things was overwhelming big time but that didnt even bother me as usual as it usually does..its like im just waiting to get started and i think just being out of the house and kknowing i was doing something productive really helped my outlook..being stuck at home and not doing anything was killing me..i know i was babysitting on the weekends but even that wasnt really enough you know..im used to working or being busy and just so much time was driving me insane..but im liking training so far..i have to go tomorrow but i dont have to go the last two days...because i already have my certs and im just going to do the recert classes instead of taking the whole day class thing..and that makes me feel better too...i talked some in training today but it was also a lot of listening and learning the rules and policies and stuff..it was really interesting getting to talk about all of the different mental illness's and the syptoms and things..i still find that so so interesting! but it was fun and i really liked that part best i think..and then came home and the ppl are here working on the lights and some electrical stuff and they had my room fixed again and that made me feel alot better..because i came home yesterday and had no lights in my room and that really rreally pissed me off after being gone all weekend to come home to no lights in my room and my room was the only one not working..but its fixed and the other lights that were working are fixed and its really nice the have them back on lol..

speent the weekend with riley and harris again and had our usual fun goofing off and chasing each other around the house and tickling and playing scrabble and cnoversating with my friend from israel lol..harris has learned the fine art of chatting online and i let him talk to a friend of mine and now he is positive he knows her and wants to talk to her again lol..and i know im staying with them this coming up weekend also cas there mom is out of town again..and even though there dad is there he kinda likes or me to hang around and its like im getting paid while im there regardless..its like i get paid to have fun and watch movies and hang out lol..who could ask for a better parrt time job :) and harris and riley are both becoming pros at cooking breakfast food! they can now both make pancakes and eggs with little prompting from me :) and they like doing it! this weekend is harris's birthday also and he is turning 9..gosh i feel so old lol considering i have been babysitting him for 9 years and riley for 10..and then harris is using all the age jokes he can and he called me ma'm the other day and i told him he was pushing it lol..i told them they could have me for a year before i left again...talk about attached ..but with those two i dont mind..saw the other 2 girls i used to watch on sunday when they came to visit my two and they both gave me hugs and there mom gave me a hug and its like with both of those families i belong there..im usefull..wonder why that doesnt happen at home?

and to make my night better..i got some extra money and it just made paying bills this month so much easier! im so excited and happy right now..like i can breathe a little bit easier knowing i will make it another month because i was worried since it waws explained today that it would be a little while before i actually started getting paid regularly with my new job..so that was a huge huge big deal..and i wouldnt have even know about it if i hadnt checked my bank account!! wow..now i want to go and trat myself to something nice but ill have to wait until later in the week to do something. funny sometimes how things just manage to work out isnt it..