im doing alright i guess...really wanting to see my therapist but just trying to stay calm..and not think to much about cutting...because in my emptiness yesterday i realized that it was cutting that kinda grounded me with all that...instead i just watched a movie and eventually fell asleep..im still tired..and im still not doing anything important...i really need to clean up and i just cant seem to find the motivation at all to do it...the messiness is really bothering me..but i lose interest so fast..and i keep pulling stuff out and not putting it back..and so its a little bit frustrating..hopefully ill mkae some headway with it though sometime today..i really want to take a nap though..
i made a couple of collages yesterday night too..ill have to see if i can get them to post on here..ill have to get better pictures of them..
im actually almost excited about the cruise in may..im hoping it works out..i really am..still a bit jealous about it at the same time..but ill get over it..i want to go..i want to get away...maybe thats why im looking forward to it so much..its a chance to get away from things.even if mommy will be there..i just need a vacation..im thinking ill just go ahead and take off for a week and a half from work..well some of those days im off already but ill have to get all that figured out too...
hmm not much to talk about though...feeling kinda blahish...still slightly disconnected i think
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