temper temper

i was mad...really mad like 10 mins ago...now im not really mad anymore and of course in the span of about 20 minutes i cut and messed my wrist up again after watching it take almost a month to look normal again...theres just no point to any of it anymore really...what is the point in yelling at me like i could someohw change pictures that have already been seem...like i would really waste my time messing up pictures im not paying for...but i still get yelled and called stupid for not knowing how to work my on stupid camera and for somehow just messing up the pictures on purpose...alright fine..im just a stupid horrible person and i deserve to die and all that fun stuff...why is it that one person can completely make me feel worthless and horrible in less than 10 mins...and im even dumber for making myself believe it