miserable day... rant for once

yesterday sucked more than any other day ive had at work..we had three kids run away..they pretty much had a mutiny against staff and i guess thats putting it the nice way..they did everything possible to just drive us up the day and if nothing else they made sure and vented every feeling some of them had yesterday and it just turned into a them against us kinda thing..it wasnt fair at all and it was just tiring having almost all of them just throw everything we have done for them back at us and they dont care..they dont want to be here and they are just doing everything to make it miserable for everyone else and its not fair at all..three walked off yesterday before dinner..one came back within an hour on his own but the other two didnt turn up until almost 2 this morning..the cops were there..they were getting ready to do search parties to search in the woods behind the camp and then the kids were there and it was just im glad your ok but good god i just really want to yell at you both right now..so i spent the morning ignoring them completely..i had nothing at all to say to them because yes they knew better and they only did it to try and make a point as we were told a million times during theday yesterday..they are being completely ungrateful..we are gettaing ready to take them on a two week trip to fla..and they dont want to go, they dont care..they think we put to many restrictions on them when they cant even do the little stuff we ask on a daily basis!! and they say they have to many restrictions..what the heck..if they would listen and stop hearing just what they want to them maaybe it wouldnt be so bad but they tune us out and then when they cant do something its entirely our fault like we are out to get them or something..they say they dont have enough time to themselves when they dont use the time we give them! they choose to stay with the group, they dont ask to go on walk or to go off by themselves and its like dont bring it up now when you have never asked for it..dont try and us it against us when you know its a lie and isnt going to help you in anyway at all right now..it annoyed me so much that they just cant see what it is we are trying to do and they dont care, they dont want it and it does feel like we are wasting our time to make things better for them and all they can se is the negatives that care put in place more often than not because of there behaviors..its not on us atall but we are still the bad guys..i dont get it....i hate that jon can cancel school and dump the kids on us when these are the kids that need routine..the counselors cant take days off so why should they get days off..they have the weekends and they get to leave at 5 during the week but we are there 24 hours a day..there is no relief if anything happened and one of us had to leave because then someone from the other side would have to come and take over and its not fair to them...but school can get cancelled and the kids routine is screwed up and we have to deal with the aftermath ...all the major blowups have happened when they have had an unplanned day from school..and its not fair to us either when we need the time they are in school to get other things done..and then everyone is just on edge and fed up with being around the group all day without any real plans...how is it fair that its the counselors that have to deal with all the stupid little petty issues they can come up with, we have to deal with all the yelling and screaming and cursing and fights, we are called really bad things and still have to show up and deal with them because we dont get the option to just not do it..yes we only have to work 3 or 4 days at a time but it takes less than an hour of being with them to make us miserable and wornout when we havent done anything but maybe get them up in the morning..some of them cant get up without an argument or a fight and they dont listen and argue everything we ask them to do..and its us not the managers that are there dealing with them and so wehn things dont go well we keep being the bad ones because we are the ones telling them they cant do this or that..and it doesnt really matter if it was one of the management ppl that told us they couldnt do it in the first place..we are the ones actually telling them the bad news and so we just suck horribly..its so frustrating because we are really supported i guess by the ppl who should be helping out more..if the kids are supposed to be in school until 4:30 then make them sstay that long..dont let them out at 2:30 and say go up to the cabins..dont make promises to them without telling us first..and then dont makme promises that you have nothing to do with and then just assume we as staff are going to want to do it..how in the hell can you promise that they can have a campfire or go to the mall or movies without even taking the time to ask us first..then the kids us it against us and we cant do anything but either say ok or no and if it is a no then the world might as well just end now and we can forget doing anything at all productive..dont take kids aside and have one on ones without telling us what you have promised him..we cant go on his word but then no one but him knows what you told him..and then we cant get up with you and cant do anything but bring him along when he doessnt deserve to go anywhere...and dont blame us for what happens to graham when you know as well as we dothat he doesnt care..dont make it so that if he isnt happy then we are doing something wrong..that one i think hurts the most because it has suddenly become dont do anything to set graham off because the manager wants him to stay...he should have bene sent home already..we have asked that he be sent home or go to a different program and nothing has happened yet..he keeps getting in big trouble..three times the cops have been called for something he has done and he is still here..he makes the group miserable and still jon will not send him home..we are going to fla on monday and graham doesnt need to go..why when on every trip he has dont something unsafe on the bus..choking other students, farting on purpose and finding it funny, being rude and inappropriate and just stupid..freaking out when he cant get his way and we come back from the trips telling them what he does and they dont take it seriously enough..they give him chance aafter chance and its the counselors that are still stuck with him all day long..7 other kids but its graham that gets the most attention because nothing can happen if graham doesnt want it too..and i hate that it has come to that..i hate that its suddenly do everything to keep graham calm regardless of what the group needs..i sorry to see him have to go home because the kid does need help but we have done everything possible for him and he doesnt care..endless hours talking to him and watching him and having fun when he is in a good mood..but when he isnt in a good mood then no one can really let there gaurd down because anything can set him off..the group didnt want him back at one point and he was still put back in the group..he was supposed to go to stone mountain for a weekend and it didnt happen..he has already been to juvie and he brags about it..he doesnt know anything about the real world and if he keeps acting the way hes acting he will end up in jail and maybe he does need something like that for a wake up call but i would hate if anything happened to him...but we cant help him here and maybe at some point he will figure it out..but i dont know what will take for that to happen..when ive asked him about it he always says he wants to stay here because being here with us is better than him being at home..he can talk about how osme of his behaviors have changed and true some have but he is still the same old graham and he thinks the world was made to please him..his view is right and screw what anyone else thinks or wants..i dont want him to go home because he will just get in trouble but i dont really know where he will go after here..its sad thinking we are losing him and that we couldnt really get through to him..its like maybe we didnt try hard enough..maybe there was something else we could have tried..but i know we have tried everything possible with what we have..i will miss him..i know i will but i still hope he finds what he needs i guess..i worry about a lot of the kids in the program and i have no idea how they made it in there reg schools..i dont know how they handled it when i see how they act here and what they say and its like its no wonder you say you have no friends..its no wonder you are here..but they are only here for a little bit longer and then they will go home and some of them will go back to there reg schools..some of them are already being told they are coming back next session..and its weird i guess..for as much as they yell and scream and for one even say we are abusing him they want to come back..they will be back over the summer, they will be back next session..sometimes i dont get their thinking at all..