things are changing

i have been approved for an apartment...we are moving tomorrow..literally...it is taking everything i have but we will be out of the hotel...everything else will just have to work out somehow...but i will actually have an address and my own place again...

its been 7 months of back and forth and looking and trying and all sorts of things...but i go full time at my job next week..and we will have an apartment again...

hopefully we will be able to get all of my stuff out of storage by the end of the month..and i will be in a safe place..my own place again..with a roommate but well if we can stay in a single hotel room together..i think that living together will be ok..

its just that so much is changing all at the same time and im afraid that with the overwhelming feelings that i will start to go backwards again...looking for comfort in something..i am nervous about all the changes and afraid at the same time that i am losing the support that i am just beginning to accept...no more seeing liz...anita will possibly  go to every other week..and im not sure how helpful that will really be...i dont know..im just afraid that all of it will be pulled out  from under me...that so many things are happening..that something will happen...im just afraid i guess..