scary realness

im moving in 2 weeks..really truly moving and it scares the crap out of me...everything is just about in order and every piece of the puzzle is starting to be put into place..and its all happened one after the other in the past week or so...first we got the go ahead with the apartment, then i got the job, then mommy made the reservation for the moving truck yesterday..i gave my notice kinda last week and this week i have to make it final..all thats left really is packing...i have two weeks to pack up my room..and then its moving and theres nothing else..thats everything...i never really thought it would happen..i really didnt..and it makes me so sad but at the same time i know this is my ticket out of being at home and i cant not take it...its not ok at home and i stayed a lot longer than i should have in hopes that it would work out and be ok and its hasnt changed yet..and so i cant keep hoping that it will change..it hurts to much to keep hoping and to constantly be let down..and so now its time to move and i cant change my mind anymore about it now..everything is in place..almost everyone knows...i have to go..i am going..im ok with going but still im just scared a little bit..ok a lot...starting over..being in a new place...last night i was worrying about how i would deal with the new job ... and how i would handle it..so many things to worry about..but i guess its ok..i hope its ok..ill be worrying a lot the next couple weeks ...