Thursday, July 16, 2015

guess I'll give myself a pep talk

I feel like life is playing with me...like this is all some big cosmic joke and I'm in the middle of it..so much going on and I'm not sure what else I can handle..I'm tired..of all of it.. everything...
But reality sets in once again and I know that I can't give up..this mess goin  on with tramaine won't break me.I'm doing what I can...I'm doing the best I can to survive and stay stable..I'm not going to keep going back and forth with her..I've asked her to stop calling mommy and she has refused..so now it will be time to make decisions..I can't make money appear out of nothing...I have to keep living and move past this and keep trying and yes pay off all of this debt before it kills me...but right now..it's one thing at a time.working in therapy and looking for a job..And working enough hours that I can start to pay Rob back again...so much has happened..I became jobless and homeless all at the same time...there was nothing to fall back on... but I have Sarah and Anita ..check mommy in small doses , nia and avante...I'm not alone.   I need to reach  out more but I'm not alone...And what has happened can't be changed...what will  happen from here on out is still developing...And somehow someway things are going to get better...I will work on accepting where things are now and the steps I need to get them moving in the right direction...
One step at a time..as long as I don't stop moving...

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